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Sunday, November 23, 2008

I told you every day
I told you every night in every way
I love you

Maybe you got scared
Maybe I have nothing else to say
But I love you
So baby now my life's a mess
Cos I couldn't love you any less

you seem to be able to make me feel like a different person. or maybe it's just me trying to run away from myself and the truth. i try to be normal, but i just can't be me anymore. the girl you knew died a long time ago. your girl will never be back again. somehow, everything i do seems so surreal. it wouldn't really matter if i just disappeared today. it's not like i want the world to end now or anything, but like, nothing really seems to matter to me. i wouldn't die happy, yet i wouldn't die sad anyway.

i feel nothing. nothingness. is that how one is supposed to feel when he dies? and recently, i seem to put on that expressionless face, because i don't know what to feel. but well, on second thoughts, doesn't everyone in this world wear masks? and hide everything inside. pretending to be someone you're not.

i train to keep myself sane. i study to keep my brain occupied so there's no room for thoughts of you. i breathe to keep myself alive.

ps. i still steal glances at you all the time.
pps. what happened to the promise not to miss you now.
ppps. (i forgot what i wanted to type here.)

my heart still bleeds for you.




tag/links

and now the stars
aren't out tonight, but
neither are we,
to look up at them.
why does hello feel like goodbye?
these memories
can't replace
these wishes I wished
and dreams I chased.
take this broken heart,
and make it right.

when will you save me?



stabbed my heart.